Kids Are So Mean

As the kids continue to grow bigger and older, so does their intelligence and understanding of the world around them as well as how people interact with their surroundings.  Along with that understanding comes the ability to recognize how a situation will affect them personally and the ability to alter that situation to their benefit with words or actions.  So it is really no surprise that as the monsters grow, so grows the sibling rivalry, the bickering, and the down right nastiness toward each other at times.   We are all born with an ego centric, self preservation instinct which was evident to us when the twins were still babies.  Not even old enough to crawl yet, Abby and Chloe both wanted to play with a book and went mortal combat on each other trying to get it from the other (pay no attention to the smile on my face from the amusement of this battle).

 While most of the physicality now involves Lawson pushing or punching, the verbal assaults range from comical to cutting, and girls can be down right mean to each other.    It doesn't take much as they have each learned the others hot buttons and what really gets under their skin.  The twins know that when Lily wants be left alone and play in her room, that is the ideal time to barge in and out of her room or simply sit out side her room and occasionally crack the door and whisper "Liiiiiiiiily" in that mischievous tone.  Oh the laughs they enjoy together followed by the angry chastising from Lily.  They all know that when Abby is on the verge of a tantrum, a simple touch of her arm or picking up her blanket will send her over the edge.  Even Lawson at 2 years old knows that when the girls are playing dolls and they have them spread out on their blanket just so, that is the perfect time to rip the blankets out from under and then run for his life.

Lily was attending a sleepover, and as is customary she had to listen to my speech regarding manners and proper behavior.  The sleepover speech includes a directive to play nicely even when the other girls want to play something else, and make sure you include everybody in your games which also means do not tell secrets intentionally in front of other girls.  Lily has heard my speeches enough that  she can recite most of it in tandem with me, and this instance was no different except for her final comments.  She was nodding at me just enough to give the impression she was listening, and would give the occasional eye roll, and then she said, "Daddy, it's ok if we don't include somebody for a little while because we can always apologize to them."

Just when you think the monsters are about to go Cain and Abel on each other, they do something to show that they really care and love each other.  Many times you just have to give them something to rally around each other with, and that generally means we have gotten on to them and have become the big bad daddy or mommy that they rally against. 

Chloe has become the nurturing one of the group and always has a hug or kind word when one of the other kids is struggling to keep it together.  Sometimes she can console in unique and funny ways.  Abby was having a night time melt down and when she enters the melt down, there is no consoling her for quite some time.  Kasey was try to calm her and Chloe realized this was going on for a while and she had enough.  Chloe decided to go ahead and say her prayers for the evening, and after thanking Jesus for everybody she ended with a special prayer for Abby.  "Jesus, please help Abby stop crying so I can get some sleep here."

Jeff, Kasey, Lily, Abby, Chloe, Lawson Boy and Jingles

Busy, Busy, Busy

Busy, Busy, Busy is not simply a reference to Kasey and my days, weeks, and months.  We are officially entering into the stage in which the kids have an activity almost every night of the week.  The twins have started soccer, which at 3 years old is probably too early for them and more akin to herding cats than actually playing soccer.  Lily has gymnastics, cheer practice, soccer practice, and then a game for both soccer and cheer on Saturdays.  Due to some rain this past weekend, we jumped at the chance to make the assumption that all games are cancelled and just stay home for the day.   While Lawson Boy has not been enrolled in any activity, he stays plenty busy going from practice to practice, game to game, and has become quite proficient at locating the closest playground.  Don't turn your back to watch a game because he will stealth away to a playground without so much as a hint as to where he is going.

We do find great joy in watching the kids play and begin to hone their skills.  Lily did not enjoy soccer for a while because she felt the other kids were better than her, and frankly the other kids were better than her.  She has learned that putting forth some effort and practicing has improved her ability by leaps and bounds.  Her favorite by far is gymnastics and it shows based upon the effort and time she puts into it.  When she started just a short couple months ago, her cart wheels resembled a kid trying to donkey kick the person behind her.  Now she is close to performing a hand spring with her legs completely straight.  The Cheer comes pretty natural as she loves to dance, and she love to include the twins and teach them how to cheer.  Unfortunately she also loves to teach the Boy how to cheer.  While at Cheer practice the other day, sitting amongst the other cheer moms, Lawson decided he would show off his skills.  In his cute little babbling raspy voice, he sounds out his cheer with flawless choreography, and one of the moms looks at me and sadly asks, "ahhhh, does he know all the cheers."  In a tone lacking in pride, "why yes he does, he sure knows how to make his daddy proud."

Abby and Chloe sure look cute in their soccer outfits, but it is painful to try and get a 3 year old to pay attention when all they really want to do is anything but play soccer.  While there is probably something they are learning and it's good for them, it drives me crazy trying to understand why 2 kids who never stop moving or talking can enter an atmosphere that promotes running, kicking and playing, and all they do is stand there with this dumb look on their face. 

Hard to believe the summer has come and gone and Lily is back in school.  She does like school and being around all her friends, and now complains less about being bored.  That was the summer theme for Lily, "I'm bored."  We had our first trip to the ER for stitches.  While my money was on Lawson, it was actually Lily that busted her chin open swinging between the counters in the kitchen.  It's a sweet scar that matches her daddy's, but that story is better left undocumented.

Football season is upon us and though my boy is not afraid to blurt out a cheer in public, he loves watching football with his daddy.  Busy as we may be, watching a game with the Boy will cure all......until he decides to headbutt you as soon as you fall asleep.  That smarts.

Jeff, Kasey, Lily, Abby, Chloe, Lawson Boy and Jingles

Lily, where's your popsicle?

Remember when your parents used to say, "this hurts me more than it hurts you"?  And you are sitting there thinking, I'm the one who just got handed the tookus beating, how in the world could that hurt you more than it hurt me?  You never truly understand that statement until you begin disciplining your own children.  Certainly you understand the concept as you grow older, but to truly understand it is to live it and trudge forward with the consequence you are doling out as your child sobs, and everything in you is urging you to just give in and comfort that child. 

We were all eating dinner one evening and Lily started in with her attitude that she did not care for this dinner and she was going to let it be known.  Coupled with her tendency to already eat slow and never stop talking at the dinner table, our patience had worn thin with her and she was encouraged to stop talking and simply eat her dinner.  The other three children were eating and behaving well, relatively speaking, so a Popsicle was offered to them as a reward for their good behavior.  That may not seem like much, and it really isn't, but we don't keep very many treats or candy around the house so when a delicious treat like a Popsicle is offered the children tend to get excited.  Lily was excited about the Popsicle, but took for granted that she would get one no matter what because in her mind that is only fair.  She continued to be stubborn with her dinner, so holding back the Popsicle seemed like the best consequence to encourage her.  As any good parent knows, once you throw that threat out there, you have to follow through or your kids will walk all over you.  The stubbornness continued, the consequence was handed down, and the tears starting flowing. 

I'm a sucker for the tears and Lily knows how to look at me just the right way to tug on my heart strings, but she had to sit there and watch her siblings eat there Popsicle and that is where the true punishment began.  Oh the joy that Abby and Chloe took in savoring that Popsicle on Lily's behalf.  They waved them around, made up songs about the Popsicle, and Chloe made sure to mention what color everybody had.  "Lawson ate his dinner and has a red Popsicle, Abby ate her dinner and has an orange Popsicle, I ate my dinner and have a purple Popsicle......Lily, you didn't get a Popsicle."  At this point, I took some compassion and at least let Lily be excused from the table so not to endure the obscene gloating.

Punishing our children can be very hard at times given the different circumstances we find ourselves in.  Whether it be in public with witnesses all judging your tactics, or at home in private where it easy to let them get away with it this time because you are so tired of having to correct them over and over and over.  We are certainly not perfect, but we try to be consistent and stay true to teaching our kids manners and respect.  We struggle at times due to the fact that we are out numbered and have to run a zone defense instead of man to man, and the inmates try to take over the asylum.  In the end we know that however hard it is, our kids will be better for it.  When you take time to punish your children, you are letting them know you care about them and their actions. 

(And I'm not talking about beating your kids......I shouldn't have to say that, but this is going out in open format online, and you never know when some new age passive PETA loving freak will take this the wrong way.) 

Jeff, Kasey, Lily, Abby, Chloe and Lawson Boy

The World Through the Eyes of Kids

Seeing as how the days start very early and we are wiped out by the time we get the kids down to bed, I thought I would try to sneak in a post while at work today.  My intentions are to write at least one post per week just to keep up with half the stuff we want to remember about this time in our life.  As frustrating as raising 4 kids can be at times, we do laugh a lot and find great joy in watching the kids learn and experience new things. 

We were recently on a trip down to San Antonio for my 20 year reunion.  That's right, 20 years since I graduated high school and went off to college as an eager young man with dreams and high hopes of a successful future.  No way in H-E double hockey sticks was there a vision of 4 kids in my future, so I guess my dreams just weren't big enough back then.  Anyway, while making the track down I-35 after everybody had stopped screaming and yelling at each other, the kids were staring out the windows into the darkness.  Just when we thought they were all asleep, Abby broke the silence with an odd and somewhat angry statement.  "GO AWAY MOON", she blurted.  It took a minute for it register what she was saying and then the moon appeared out the window to my left.  "Daddy, the moon is following us, why is it following us?"  Instead of explaining the scientific reasons why it appeared the moon was following our car down the highway (not that I could do that anyway), we made a game out of it and I told her the moon was actually trying to race us to Mama and Papa's house.  The kids thought this was great and encourage me to drive faster.  "Faster Daddy, Go Faster!"  Realizing my susceptibility to a child's influence, my story changed to the moon is really following us to keep us safe.  The best part about raising kids is you see the world in a completely different and innocent light.

We were coming home late earlier this week when Lawson noticed the moon outside his window.  "Daddy, Mama and Papa house?"  It took me a minute to remember our trip and then realized he now associated the moon with driving to San Antonio.  It gives me hope that Lawson Boy's head may be used for something other than just a battering ram.

The kids seem to be enjoying their summer so far.  Lily was able to spend extra time in San Antonio by herself, which made her very happy to have some time away from her brother and sisters.  Lawson is anything but a baby anymore.  He has entered into the terrible 2 stage and is not bashful to let you know his feelings.  When he does not get his way or you start to get on to him, he points his finger directly at your and yells, "NO."  This fun little gesture is typically followed with a full palm held at you as he utters, "Thtop", and "NO" once again.  Aunt Chelle witnessed this lovely interaction between Lawson and I, and now uses this tactic on her teenage kids (Morgan going into college this year), though I believe the only reaction she will get from this style of discipline is uncontrollable laughter.

We are looking forward to the beginning of even busier times which should last the next 15 years.  Lily is in soccer, gymnastics and cheer leading.  The twins will start soccer this fall, which I cannot wait to see how that goes.  My prediction is Chloe will enjoy socializing with the other girls, and Abby will give her all to being the best soccer player on the field.  She takes after her daddy a bit, and does not like to lose.  Hopefully she can keep her temper in check seeing as she wears all her emotions on her sleeve.  Regardless, it may take more than one mini-van in this household to shuffle the monsters around to all these events. 

An update on the final member of our family.  Jingles is about as tall as Lawson now, and listens about as well as Lawson too.  Good thing he can't raise a finger and say "Thtop".

Jeff, Kasey, Lily, Abby, Chloe, Lawson Boy, and Jingles

When Lawson Attacks

It was apparent to me that the blog had not been upated in a while, but I had not idea it had been close to 2 months.  It would take another 2 months to share all the crazy and funny things that have happened in that time period, but let's give it a shot anyway.  The highlights of the past couple months go something like this:

Lily graduated kindergarten, turned 6 years old, and convinced me she was resonsible enough to take care of a dog (as if we don't have enough mouths to feed around this asylum).  Surprisingly, she has done a great job of taking care of Jingles, and even cleans the poop with relatively few comnplaints.  For her 6th birthday we let Lily have a sleepover and our house was inundated with 10 6 year old girls who when they get together love to scream alot.  And the bossiness of those girls......who knew?  We are so proud of how Lily did in Kindergarten this year.  It's amazing how much she learned and how well she reads.  We absolutely loved her teacher, because she really emphasized discipline and somehow Lily made it through the year coming home with a green bear every day.  Though now she admits had a yellow bear one day and turned her attitude around at the end of the day to earn her green bear back.  The reading comes in handy and we do take advantage when Lawson or the twins want us to read them something we occassionally tell them to go ask Lily to read it.  As you can see from her picture below, she is turning into a beautiful young lady.  I catch myself staring at her sometimes just wondering what the future holds for her and it makes me smile.  She catches me and says, "Daddy, what are you staring at?, in  that tone that only a 6 year old girl going on 18 can have.  Lily continue to crack me up with her sense of humor.  She is at the age where I share stories with her about my child hood, or make general observations about things that I think are funny and she and I will laugh uncontrollably together.  We  have the same sense of humor, which typically means we end up laughing about fart stories.

Abby and Chloe are potty trained!  Abby and Chloe are potty trained!  Abby and Chloe are potty trained!  Obviously we are excited about the potty training and only one kid left in diapers.  While potty trained, they still drive us absolutley bonkers with the constant jibber jabber and never ending energy to destroy things. 

Here they sleep and provide a moment of peace

Abby was a little slower with the potty training and she tends to live in them moment and that meant not stopping what she doing to take a moment and walk to the potty.  The great thing about Abby is you always know what she is thinking because she wears her emotions on her sleeve.  When she is excited about something, she lets you know and you can see the excitement all over her face.  When she is upset her uncontrollable screaming and flapping of the arms makes it apparent.  When she is sad, that pitiful face will break your heart.  She is the most energetic of all the kids too.  If we could figure out a weight to bottle her energy and sell it, we'd be rich.  Because she is so active and never stops moving during the day, when it's time for bed, she is ready to go.  A common phrase from her in the evening, "Daddy, the sun is almost down, can we go night night now?"

Chloe is my silly girl.  She is pretty laid back (relatively speaking) and just doesn't take too many things that serious.  I'm starting to hear her come up with ideas and then convince Abby or Lawson that it is the right thing to do, and that never turns out well.  Generally speaking we have done a good job with teaching respect and manners, but Chloe has work to do in the meal time manners department.  She can't hardly eat 5 bites without burping, and I'm not talking cute little girl burps.  These are the type that come from your grandpa who just ate something bad and really can't help it. 

We've signed the twins up for soccer and I cant' wait to see that.  My anticipatoin is that Abby will love running around chasing after the ball, and Chloe will be walking around demanding they stop and just give her the ball. 

And then there is Lawson Boy.  It's been expressed to me that I favor Lawson Boy, and though I won't admit to favoring him because I love all my children equally, I will admit to spoiling him a bit.  He is the baby of them all, and he just happened to be the only boy, so he gets away with more.  Some of it is I don't have the energy to repeat myself over  and over like I would have when Lily was his age.  And some of it is, the kid does stuff that I know he shouldn't, but it just make me laugh.  When he gets in his mischievious state, he gives a look and I feel like I'm looking at myself, and I understand that even what he is about to do may not be a good idea, it sure does look fun.  I empathize with the boy.  Lawson is really mastering the english language, but there are time when all we hear is mumbling.  What comes out of his mouth makes sense to him and you can see the frustration on his face as he repeatedly expresses himself with more frustration each time.  And then the index finger comes out,  points at you, and he proceeds to utter a jibberish string of unrecognizable words, but the point is very clear.  He is verbally assaulting you for not being able to understand him, and you are very close to a Lawson smackdown. 

All the kids are doing pretty well with the addition of Jingles to the family.  Jingles is still in his nipping stage and is becoming very energetic, and that will scare the girls at times.  They love when he is calm and they can hold him and they truly adore the dog.  Lawson shows his love in other ways.  The child has no fear of the dog and actually encourages the rough behavior in a way only a boy can do.  The dog will be standing there and Lawson will lower his shoulder like a linebacker and throw himself into Jingles, and then curl up to protect himself because he knows the dog is about to jump all over and starting nipping at him.  This little game led to multiple scrapes and a nice cut on the top of Lawson's forehead.  And every time when you think the boy is down there crying, he stands up with a big grin on his face laughing.

Jeff, Kasey, Lily, Abby, Chloe, Mike Singletary, and Jingles

Potty Time

Obviously from the title of this post, we are trying to potty train the twins.  And by "we", I mean Kasey and Ms. Lauren.  We have been encouraging the 2 of them to go in the potty for well over a year now, and they simply have no interest whatsoever.  So today they were forced to go outside in the same clothes the good Lord brought them into this world in.  Kasey has been updating me though out the day and at this point it appears that Chloe has gone tee tee a couple of time and Abby still insists that she is not a big girl and she would like to continue wearing the diaper.  Too bad kiddo.  Somebody may be cleaning crap off the floor, but you are going to pee or poop somewhere besides that diaper today. 

By now, I've lost track of all things that we promised or bribed them with.  We started with candy, then a toy, a special one on one night with mommy or daddy, and now I believe I have backed myself into a corner and once this process is complete it appears we will have a 4 legged canine running around our house.  Ms. Lauren has a little dog that we watched for the weekend and Lily was driven to prove that she was responsible enough to take care of a dog.  Actually, she did quite well taking her outside, feeding her, and she slept with her at night.  The only area I would give her a failing grade on is protecting the puppy from Lawson Boy.  Lawson worked so hard to coax that dog onto his lap, and when he was finally convinced Bella was not going to come to him, he decided to try and sit on the dog instead.  Luckily Bella is quick on her feet. 

Speaking of Lawson Boy........when I started this blog probably close to a year ago already, he was still a baby and the twins were in that stage where they try to communicate and then get really frustrated when you don't understand what they are saying.  Well the boy has entered that stage and he must take after his mother, because he has quite the temper when you can't understand what he is saying.  The longer you take to figure it out, the louder and madder he gets at you.  I know he is trying to hard to get his point across, and you don't want to get mad at him, but you also cannot let him speak to you that way.  Kasey keeps getting mad at me because when Lawson is trying to her something and starts yelling at her, it makes me giggle.

Lily continues to amaze us with her reading skills.  I honestly do not remember having to read every night in kindergarten, nor do I remember having homework at that age, but she has homework every night.  It is certainly paying off especially when one of the other kids asks us to read and we just tell them to take the book to Lily and let her read it to them. 

Stay tuned for potty training updates and if I'm unable to back of this bribery thing, I guess stay tuned for puppy pics.

Jeff, Kasey, Lily, Abby, Chloe, and on the verge of terrible 2 Lawson

What Do Lily and Make Tyson Have In Common?

In an effort to better myself in business and my personal life, I made note of some advice that our preacher spoke about one Sunday.  Be interruptable.  The gist being when somebody needs you or wants your attention, you should give them your full attention.  My struggle is that I have 80 employees, countless, vendors, my boss, my boss's boss,  a lovely wife and 4 kids all of which need my attention on just about any given day.  Add on top of that the fact that I have self-diagnosed myself with a slight case of adult attention deficit disorder , and it makes for a real struggle with little time to complete my tasks or have much down time.  The good news is that my commute home gives me some time to prepare for the kids daily information dump that begins immediately upon breaching the front door.  This is actually the part of my day that I look forward to most.  Nothing makes you feel than 4 kids running and greeting you enthusiastically after a long day of work.  After a few minutes, I have to stop them because they are all 4 trying to tell me what happened that day, and no matter how much I pay attention it is impossible to keep up with 3 girls jabbering and the boy trying to throw each of them off of me so I can give him my full attention.  My conscious efforts to be more interuptible are certainly not perfected, but when I make the effort I hear more of what is being said and find myself more patient with the kids as well.

Abby and Chloe are making strides in the right direction with their ability to not destroy a room in a matter of minutes.  They have still yet to potty train, but they are increasingly becoming more interested.  Both continue to make us laugh on a daily basis, and we are amazed how smart 3 years old can be and what they pick up on.  Chloe is our rule Nazi and loves to make sure that Abby is doing the right thing.  Abby is and will continue to be the emotional one and always lets you know exactly how she is feeling whether good bad or indifferent.

Lawson is mastering the art of the English language and does well to communicate in one sentence bursts.  Along with that comes the frustration when he is not able to communicate his point.  The boy has quite the temper, but then they all did at this age.  The main difference is that he enjoys using his fists more to communicate his frustration.  His appetite remains grossly disturing, and I am truly fearful of the future grocery bills. 

Last night we all met up at that mall for dinner as Ms. Lauren has taken the kids over there to get out of the house.  We have figured out how to get the kids to behave at dinner and eat all their food.  Hold off on dinner until they are really hungry, and they won't say a word and will devour their food and ask for more.  Lily wanted to ride with me on the way home as she likes to listen to the Ipod in the car and sing.  She gets to pick a song from my Ipod and then I get to pick one.  Lily chose Justin Bieber and she made fun of me for singing along with her.  I went old school and busted out Phil Collins In the Air Tonight.  If you have seen the movie Hangover you know what I mean when I say you cannot listen to the awesome buildup to the drums without picturing Mike Tyson playing air drums to the song.  Lily thoroughly enjoyed this part as especially since I cranked the song up as load as I could.  We had to listen to at least 5 times and she laughed hysterically as she played the air drum along with the song.

Kids are awake.....let the fun begin.

Jeff, Kasey,  Lily, Abby, Chloe, and Lawson Boy