My self diagnosed OCD was getting the better of me this week, and that's not a good thing for anybody. Every time I turn around there is a new mess somewhere in this house, and every time we sit down for a meal more food ends up on the floor than in the kid's gullet holes. Needless to say the frustration factor was reaching critical mass, so it was probably not the best time to announce to Lily that she is old enough to start earning her keep around here and she would be taking on some chores. This particular evening she was in charge of clearing her dishes as well as the rest of the dishes. Her response? "Daddy, I can't believe I have to clean up after my sisters." To which I responded by listing a long series of tasks and duties such as cooking, cleaning, changing poops, picking up toys, dressing you, and many more that we have to accomplish daily. I asked her, "what do you have to do?" She said, "I have to play and watch TV!" Well it must be nice.
Apparently she took our little talk to heart, and though there has not been a noticeable difference in what she does around the house, she does feel as though she carries a large burden of responsibility. In Lily's words, "I'm tired of living here and I would like to live at Disney World. I have to do too much around here." Not only would the child like to not live her any further, she told us she needs a vacation. She is going to stay with Mama in a couple weeks and while she was talking on the phone like a teenager, she told her Mo she is going to San Antonio for a week because my Mommy and Daddy think I need a vacation. She also mentioned that Daddy drives her crazy. This can't be my child, can it?
Coupled with my frustration of the never ending mess is my frustration of the never ending poops. We are basically status quo on the Abby and Chloe potty training. They are interested in sitting on the potty, but it's like they have the worst case of stage fright as soon as they mount the porcelain. Both of them came to me today with dirty diapers and I had both of their attentions while I was changing the stank. Instead of encouraging with patience today, I though I would try a new tactic.......belittle them. Once again I'm not proud, but I'm desperate. So I told them that they must be babies because only babies poo poo their diapers, and big girls poop in the potty. I continued with my verbal abuse and ridicule calling them babies, and Abby may have got her feelings her hurt a little. Chloe however responded in a way that only Chloe would respond. She looked at me with a look of puzzlement as to what I was talking about and said, "Daddy, we not babies, WE TWINS!"
Even though the Boy cannot talk yet, he understands just fine and has no issue defying us. Two evenings ago he was crawling over to different things, pulling up, practicing his cruising techniques, and generally just being a good kid not bothering anybody. Realizing that is was getting late as I stood he looked back to see what I was doing. Taking a step toward him, I asked if he was ready for nite nite. Those last 2 words I spoke lit a fire under his belly and he took off in the other direction leaving skid marks. The Boy was not ready to hit the hay just yet. He got about 10 feet away, stopped to look over his shoulder and see what I was doing. As soon as I took a step toward him, BOOM, the after burners kicked in and he was off again. Once I finally rangled him, he got a big laugh out of the whole scene and we have now made it part of our nightly ritual.
Kasey will be taking over the reins of the blog next week, as I will be suffering through a business trip to San Diego where the weather is rumored to be in the 70's. I look forward to her series of blogs on Kids vs. Mommy.
Jeff, Kasey, Lily, Abby, Chloe, and the evasive Lawson Boy
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